How to Respond When the Kids Say “Mommy Said You’re Mean”
- Michael Capleone, Sr.
- 2 days ago
- 2 min read
Hearing your child say, “Mommy said you’re mean,” can feel like a gut punch. It’s more than hurt feelings—it’s a sign of potential manipulation or even early-stage alienation. How you respond matters. You’re not just reacting in the moment—you’re shaping how your child feels about both of their parents, and how the court could see your parental stability down the road.
Here’s the golden rule: Never retaliate. Never badmouth your ex. Instead, use calm and affirming responses like:
“I’m sorry she feels that way. I’ll always love you no matter what.”
“Sometimes adults say things when they’re upset. What matters is how we treat each other now.”
These comments validate your child’s emotions without escalating tension. And they show emotional maturity—something judges and therapists will respect if conflict continues.
If this happens often, keep a log. Document the language. Note the date. These details matter if things ever shift toward a custody modification or a court evaluation.
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Legal Disclaimer: This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. Reading this post does not create an attorney-client relationship. Every case is unique—please consult with a qualified family law attorney licensed in your jurisdiction to discuss your specific situation. Also, this blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute legal, financial, psychological, or professional advice. It does not create an attorney-client relationship or any other professional-client relationship. The information provided is not a substitute for consultation with a qualified attorney, financial advisor, tax professional, psychologist, or other expert regarding your specific situation.
